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when is the week gonna end?

There are weeks when everything is amasing... and then there are weeks where you only get seatbacks.
Like this one.
Just sayin'.
Not so long ago, Razer had believed his heart – or what had taken its place – capable of feeling only rage.
But, in time, the renegade Red Lantern had seen the light, and allowed himself to believe that there was more than that – that he could still love, despite a broken heart - an heart that wasn’t even there any longer. And together with love… came fear, that he would lose it all once again because he had always knew that no life was eternal, and death was a destiny that awaited everyone. Seeing his wife dying had been bad enough, and it had been his undoing, turning him into the monster that had blindly served Atrocitus.
Out of fear, he had broken Aya. Out of fear, he had denied himself hope – and love.
As he scoured the galaxy for his lost love, he vowed to find her – no matter what – and he promised himself he wouldn’t do the same mistake twice. For better or for worse, they belonged together, and he would have made up to her, set things right, no matter what, no matter how long it would take.
The Red Lantern smiled quietly, as the blue light kept him company, never leaving his side, never faltering, as a trusty companion.
His ring whispered to him in his sleep, but it wasn’t the old song of hate and destruction he used to listen to every moment of every day. Razer just wasn’t sure why: maybe it was because he was different, maybe it was because he had lost his edge – his uttermost, all-consuming rage – and the swallowing emotion was now directed only towards Atrocitus and himself. Or maybe, just maybe, it was the calming influence of the blue ring at his side.
The Blue Light of Hope had started followed him after he had left Oa, sure that somewhere a part of his Aya still had to exist. The ring had never taken residence on his finger, and yet, Razer known it to be his and his alone.
He wondered if it was the shadow of doubt and fear that clouded what remained of his soul – that he was wrong, that she too was truly dead – that prevented the ring from taking residence around his finger. Or maybe it was just the fact that he didn’t have an heart any longer- and although the ring knew his soul, it couldn’t fully recognize him as a living being.
Razer sighed, wondering once again if he hadn’t done a mistake leaving the side of the Green Lanterns. Then, he lifted his gaze, and watched the quiet starry night, and listened to the calm songs of the wild life of the planet he had chosen to rest his tired bones.
A lively fire was warming him up, flames dancing right before his eyes, as the magic shows he used to watch to as a kid, and, at his side, with its intermittent warm light, the Blue Ring looked like… what had Hal called it? Ah, yes, now he remembered - a lightning bug, one of Earth’s insects.
“You are right, my friend.” Razer tentatively skimmed over the light’s aura, petting the ring as it was a beloved  pet. “I can’t lose hope – not now. She is somewhere out there, and I have to find her.”
As much as he wanted to get back into Aya’s embrace, Razer wasn’t stupid: he knew that, was everything to cease to exist, his quest would have been futile.  So, when the bearer of the Black Ring presented himself once again – this time serving death himself, the Dark Lord Nekron -  the Red Lantern reluctantly answered the call, and stood, once again, at the side of his former Lord, and of the family he had chosen and who had kindly taken him in when he had nowhere else to turn to – the Green Lantern Corps, Hal and Guy and Kyle and all the others.
He wore his red ring- but the blue light was never far from him, never faltering, remembering him what awaited him once the fight would be over.
“I’ve received the message, Hal.” Razer clenched his teeth as he fought, valiantly, against what appeared to be an endlessly ocean of adversaries.
“Great,” Hal acknowledged, and Razer swore he saw his friend sweating – as he was scared, unsure of what awaited them. Not that the first Green lantern of Earth didn’t have any reason to be worried. Death was everywhere around them, and there were Black Lanterns as far as his eyes could see – and even more so. Death, he remembered someone once told him, could not be eradicated, nor fought, and as his mind wondered though those dangerous territories, her thought stroke him once again.
Aya – his Aya – had been, in a matter, alive, only to die in his embrace. Was she among those monsters, as well? Was he always doomed to keep finding his beloved again and again – only to see, each and every time, a corrupted version of his beloved in her place?
“All will be well, Lantern Razer – I have faith in tomorrow.”
Razer swallowed, hard, and nodded, the blue light at his side getting stronger, wormer, with each passing second, as to give him a strength the Red Lantern wasn’t aware he could possess.
As Razer stood between Hal and Saint Walker, the Blue Lantern kindly smiled at him, not even taken a little back from the sight of a fellow blue ring, patiently waiting for the day its bearer would be ready to welcome him.
Once spilled the blood of the Guardian of the Universe, Nekron recited his dark spell, and grinned satisfied as he made contact, opening the door towards the greatest secret ever kept: the Entity, the living light bestowed upon the universe that triggered existence itself.
 Death incarnate hit the Light with his scythe, with everything he got, his satisfied grin never faltering, as every living being started screaming in agony, sharing its pain, dying a little with each and every strike, and it was in that moment that it hit them: the Entity was the embodiment of light – but it was the same just like the other entities -   the Butcher, Ophidian, Parallax, Ion, the Proselyte, the Predator, Adara. Alone, they could do nothing, but in the hands of the right being – with the right pilot, as Hal had put it – they could do anything and everything - even overcome the odds and win the fight against Death itself.
Through the pain, he stood at the side of great warriors, powerful allies – some he knew, other were trusted friends of Hal – and did his best to keep as many Black Lanterns as possible, while none other than Sinestro took control of the Entity, bonding with it- taking back control of his life and his destiny. In his mind, the Leader of his own corps was fulfilling Abin Sur’s mission, his mentor’s legacy coming full circle, the deceased alien’s name now restored.
With the corner of his eyes, Razer look as, without hesitation nor doubt, Sinestro tore Nekron apart, taking his heart and crushing it in his fist: a victory they didn’t even had time to celebrate, as, every time the God of Death fell, he raised once again, the walking dead all around him an endless supply of host for what had existed right from the start of the universe, and in the blink of an eye, the battle restarted anew – only, this time, Sinestro, freed from his connection to the Entity, stood on the ground, powerless, a failure in his own eyes.
“Death is your destiny, Sinestro – as is yours, Hal Jordan. Like the others who came back from the dead, you did so because I allowed it. But no more - I want peace again. Life was an accident. It has no meaning, no purpose.”
“No,” Razer took a big breath, the blue light getting stronger and stronger as he closed his eyes and focused all his rage, all of his emotions, into hitting the monster who stood right before them. Nekron, he remembered him of Aja- of the similar words she had once said, when, corrupted by pain and desperation, she had tried to take all of life away, and bring peace and order to the Universe. “No. Black Hand, Nekron… it’s not life that gives us purpose. We give life purpose.”
Razer watched as Hal took matters in his own hands – together with his friends and comrades. As they channeled the power of life through their veins, embracing the power of the White Lantern, he valiantly stood among heroes he didn’t know – but who he was proud to call allies – men and women and children and people of Erath and from beyond the small blue planet, all serving together, all fighting at each other’s side with the sole purpose of serving, and saving, life.
“Let there be light,” the Entity proclaimed, “Live…”
And before they knew it… the clouds had lifted their veil upon the planet that had given birth to life, and, where once stood their enemies reanimated bodies, there was now shamble, smoke and ruins – but, most of all, stood life, victorious, in the shape of their beloved, brought back to life.
And she was there, among them, different and yet the same – the Entity had brought her back, but her body seemed much more… alive than what it used to be, as she was now made of flesh and blood and a beating heart and not just thought and conscience and heart in a metal body. She was so different -her skin as pale as the rays of the moon and not green any longer, and shiny white hair that gently skimmed over her shoulder - and yet, Razer’s heart reached out to her. In any shape, in any world, he would have always recognized her – always, forever and ever.
“My love… Aya…” He swallowed, taking a tentative first step towards her. She was looking around, confused – as she wasn’t sure of what had happened, or maybe, just maybe, couldn’t believe it herself.
As his ring went into a million of tiny little pieces, his body started to burn – not literally, of course, and yet, Razer swore it was exactly how he felt in that instant, and screamed – screamed at the top of his lungs, the pain so real and just so raw like nothing he had ever felt before, crashing his whole being, body, soul and mind.  “RAZER?!”
He fell onto the cold, wet ground of Earth, and before losing consciousness, the last thing he remembered was Aya calling his name, the pain in that sole word breaking him again and again and again, as she run to his side, and cuddled him into her embrace, the same way he had done for her before she would be consumed by Infinity.
 “Hal? What’s going on? What’s happening to Razer?” She asked, as she caressed his cold features – as cold as the metal that had once been her body. His Red Lantern uniform had disappear, gone with the ring. The man she cherished more than her life itself stood still in her arms, his eyes empty, voided of life, his features pale and greyish.
“He’s going into cardiac arrest – his heart stopped the day he became a Red Lantern, and now, without his ring…” Hal swallowed and looked sideways. He didn’t dare to end the sentence, not meet Aya’s eyes. She had just came back, had been given yet another chance at life – and yet, life had ripped what she cared the most about away from her.
“Give me your hand, Aya…” Carol Ferris – the Sapphire of Earth, and Jordan’s beloved – took a step forward, and smiled gently at the former AI. Reassuringly, the woman from Earth put an hand on Aya’s shoulder, and squeezed it, like nothing was wrong in the world. “His heart may have stopped, but, Aya, give me your hand…”
As channeling her love for Razer, Carol  took Aya’s hand, and gently skimmed with her free one over Razer’s heart. The violet –pinky light of love engulfed them, and Aya held her breath, holding back  tears, just hoping that all would be well, that, as she had been returned at last to him, Razer too would be returned in her arms, safe and sound.
“Your heart is beating, and it will help his beat again too…”
A blue ring – the same blue ring that for a long time had accompanied Razer in his travels through the cosmos, as he looked for answers, shone brighter than ever right before them, where Razer’s heart once stood.
“The blue light will reverse the effects of the red ring…” Saint Walker smiled, gently, reassuringly, his aura of quietness and rightness still in place, just like the day she had met him for the first time. Aya held her breath as she watched, amazed, as the two blue rings- Saint Walker’s and what assumed was to be Razer’s – shone brighter than the life of creation itself, engulfing the alien man.
It was a moment, and yet it lasted an eternity, it was endless. Then, finally, finally, he opened his eyes, and all he saw was her.
“Aya… are we… dead?”
She smiled, caressing his marks on his faces, gently. “No, Razer, we are alive. Both of us.”
He smiled, his features much more calmer, like the light of hope and love had graced his heart, and for the first time in his life, he  truly believed to the voice whispering a new oath in his mind, and, tentatively, he cupped her face, feeling under his fingertips the new texture of her skin – so alien, and yet so familiar.
“Hello Aya, I’ve missed you.” He smiled, and they embraced, holding each other so strongly, so close, that they looked like a single being. They hearts beat in tempo, as a single entity, and as Razer gently run an hand through her hair, Aya couldn’t stop crying, wetting his chest with her tears.
The lights of love, hope and life shone inside their souls, urging them to break away from the past and their blackest nights and head into tomorrow, where all would have been well. 

Bring me to church

Actually, no one brought me to church- I went on my own. 

When I was a young child, my grandparents — mom's parents — used to come and visit us almost every Sunday, especially during winter season when there was little or nothing to do in the Countryside. Grandpa used to get bored, so he often went to church with me. He didn't like Our Church- San Cassiano and Joseph worker — as it was brand new and extremely modern (even for today's standards), so, untill I got close to my First Communion, we used to go the Temple of St. Paul.

I remember being amazed, every time I walked in- to me, a little child, it looked so big, enormous. I often believed that it had to be as big as St. Peter in Rome, if not more. I swear. 

Then, when it was time for my First Communion, I started to go to my Church, and as he didn't like it... he stopped coming to see us, and I ended up going alone at church every Sunday, at an early hour so that we could later go and visit the grandparents (bringing lunch with us, because by then grandma's depression had worsened and she refused to do more than boiled pasta with nothing and put some bread on the table).

Read more...Collapse )
Title: Dark Shadows on the Bayou
Author: Little_Firestar
Beta-Reader: red_b_rackham
Fandom: NCIS: New Orleans
Word Count: ~ 20.000
Rating: T (to be on the safe side)
Characters & Ships: Christopher LaSalle/Original Female Character; NCIS: New Orleans team.

Genre: Romance; hurt and comfort; crime
Summary: In the sequel to "The Detective's unexpected pregnancy" and "The Broken-Hearted Club", NCIS Agent Christopher LaSalle and his wife, Georgie, are finally where they have always wanted to be- they seem to have it all, with  the perfect family and the jobs they love; but someone with a vengeance against one of them is lurking in the shadows, ready to get back what has been taken away from him… and to paint the bayou in blood red.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author.  The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise.  No copyright infringement is intended.

Links: Fanfiction.net|AO3 [completed]
Notes: written for the het_bigbang on Archive Of Our Own and on Livejournal. Thanks to
red_b_rackham for beta-reading and editing. Girl, you rock!

In Memory of Andrea

" Bone marrow donation is an important commitment to help save a life.  Understanding the process, recovery and side effects can help you decide  if donating is right for you. "

Spring, 2016 Andrea, a 18 years old kid from my hometown, was diagnosed with Leukemia. His friends, and kids from all over town, started the race to save fin- to find a suitable donor.

In a matter of months, over 2000 people, between the age of 18 and 35, got their blood (or saliva) tested, and enetered the Glabal Registry, but when the chanes are 1 on 100.000, it feels like an empty battle. 

And less than a month ago, Andrea lost the war, at age 19, and many other people — adults and children alike — face the same destiny every day, as less than 3% of who enters the registries happens to be a 100% match with someone.

Like I said — 1 on 100.000

In some country, entering the registry can happen up untill 44 years — other countries put the limit at 35 — so, if you are over 18 years old, and you are healthy (remember to check regulations on sites; just google it!) consider it. The sample for the registry is often a scrub from your mouth (like the dna on the shows, you know?) or a simple blood test: THEY DON'T ACTUALLY TAKE MARROW!

If you can- think about it. 

Still a long way to go...

I've been working on editing my work for this year's Het Little & Big Bang- it's a small bang, a bit more than 20000 words.
I've done... six chapter out of nine. And I'm struggling. For real. of course I'll do mybest to get ti done for reveal date- I would be crazy not to, after all the work me and my beta put into it- but I'm changing so many things... rewriting pieces to fix POW, explain things that in the first (or second, or whatever) draft hand't been expalined too well, changing words to avoid repetitions...
It's tiring, and I can work on it only a couple of days a week, because my home computer just kill my eyes, if I try to keep two word documents in the same screen.
Is there anyone interested in betaing a small bang (around 10k) for hetbigbang? Deadline is august, story is short-ish, and is a NCIS:New Orleans work, featuring an Original character...  which is kind of what it makes it ahrd to find soemone willing to beta-read it. (That, and the fact that when there's someone spelling "Grammar" and "gremmer", and apparently there's a lot of such people on the list of fanfiction.net beta-reader, well, what can I say, I'm not exactly tempted to give them a go...
(if karlamartinova is still interested in beta-ing like last year... I may have lost your e-mail information :) )
Few weeks ago, a costumer of mine called me "fat".
Now, I know I'm not thin; I'm not an idiot. I'm 1.50 and I go between size 44 and 46. There's just no way that I'm thin. Plus, between work- and it's my own business, so I basically spend all my time there- and family and stuff, well, I kind of got lazy, eat not too well and excercised even less. 
When this kind old lady told me so, well, I knew it. but it's one other time having someone so rudely and openly point it out to you (if I were less gracious, or had been less surprised, I would have said soemthing. Probably. Maybe.).
But, well, it kind of... woke me up.
I've lessened the amout of white flour, I eat more vegetables and fruit (even if I already ate a lot), less meat and cheese, smaller portions- and yes, following the advice of my doctor, I'm also using pills to decress the amount of sugar and fats absorbed by my body.
BUT, moslty, I invested in excercise. Not the gym- because when you finish working at 8pm, trust me, the gym is the last place you want to go to. I just bought, thanks Amazon,  a trademill and a stepper 8and started using the things I already have home) and I gave myself a timeline. Each day, at least 20 minutes.
And it's working.

This entry was originally posted at http://little-firestar.dreamwidth.org/221124.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

The other day I saw a post on tublr about how Simon "Wonder Man" explained, in a  mock, Simpson-like video, what a reality-altering event was, and Miles Morales asked him if there was anything to prevent them.
(The Answer? No, obviously).
So, it came to mind the time when, a couple of years ago, in Battle of the Atom, Young Original X-Men Scott Summers got injured deadly (but got better because, obviously, the team happened to just have an Omega Level Healer on the inside. Obviously.), for, like, two panels, and in those two panels Adult Scott Summers ceased to exist (as in, he vanished and for a few panels people didn't understand or remembered he was supposed to be there), just to reapper when Young Scott got better (again, healer.).
That would mean that Young Scott and Adult Scott are one and the same, right?
Spoilers for X-Men BlueCollapse )
So, seriously, a retcon in two months???
This entry was originally posted at http://little-firestar.dreamwidth.org/220827.html. Please comment there using OpenID.


There's poetry in that scene

After a few years- and 3 seasons- Broadchurch just neded.
And, how poethic was it, seeing Miller dressed just like she did in the first episode, with her orange jacket and that same visual, of the cliffs overseeing the sea?
(If I'm wrong, don't break my dream- I'm just overjoyed at the poetry of this image..)

This entry was originally posted at http://little-firestar.dreamwidth.org/220548.html. Please comment there using OpenID.


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